Hurting and Healing

Something hurt me so much last week that I virtually came apart, physically and emotionally. It was an unexpected thing, and of course it was something someone "said" - in this case via email. After venting via phone calls, sobs, more email rhetoric, and unrealistic, self-absorbed quick decisions of my own, I was left in a puddle of "itty bitty boo" pity. The truth is, nobody was really to blame for all of it but - you guessed it - ME. It was all about my misperceptions, miscommunications and - this is the hardest part - my righteousness. I knew I was right, Right, RIGHT - and I decided to die on my sword. It didn't matter that the original email came from someone with good intentions. I assumed the opposite just because I was RIGHT.

Thankfully, one of the other players in this crappy situation is one of my best friends. Once we reassured each other about our enduring friendship, it opened the door for us to look at how each of us played a role in creating the problem that led to the nuclear meltdown. The episode couldn't have come at a worse time for either of us; and now I realize that was part of the lesson. It was a good reminder that we didn't create the universe and we're not running it, either.

No need to post any more about the issue. It's resolving itself thanks to everyone involved taking responsibility, including me. Now if I can just take responsibility for eating all that Mexican food yesterday, I'll be healed.